I can't really "sum up" what happened tonight. I feel just as melancholy as when I left for the gig.
I believe, though it isn't my place to say, that I was one of the better performers tonight. I remember one woman desperately clutching her mouth trying not to screech with laughter as tears rolled down her face, I reassured her "it's OK to laugh". I got a polite hand shake from the compare with an "I really enjoyed it", which is more than the other newcomers got. All-in-all I reckon I impressed the right people and it went rather smoothly.
But... I didn't feel comfortable at all. There seemed to be a very clear divide between the new acts and the more established ones. I didn't belong with the more established ones, and yet I felt I did not fit in with the new acts at all, to put it nicely, they were trying a little too hard off stage.
The room was no bigger than my living room and seated about 25. It seemed a fitting illustration of somewhere aspiring comics start.
To my understanding it was agreed I'd do 10 - 15 mins tonight (which I had prepared), though without notification that had been cut to 8 - 10 mins, and then at last minute we were all told 5 mins only as we were running over schedule. I did about 4 1/2 mins and was the only act not to break the 5 mins, a bit of professionalism I learn in New York.
Despite doing well tonight I did not feel I wholly expressed my full potential, caged by the 5 min rule. The room was delightful and had so much scope for audience interaction, and opportunity to let my persona flourish. I left the "stage" mildly unfulfilled.
After the gig there was no "fans" and socialising, everyone dispersed and so I disappeared back to my box, where I am now, reflecting.
I know I did well but I don't think I wowed.
I'm pleased with myself for one thing though, I was different to all the other acts. I have been debating for a while as to what is more important, originality or accessibility. Now I feel I can truly explore the more experimental side of my act without sacrificing too much.
I have a day off tomorrow, I'm being joined by my lover, we are going to see Cirque du Soliel.
Photos tomorrow I promise.
2 comments:
Of course you don't feel wowed by your first performance you are taking on a totally new environment. You've been so used to performing to people you know you were geared up to feel exhilerated by the crowds. I'm sure this is one of the first and best lessons you'll learn this month. Just don't be put off by it, once you get used to the culture of the crowds you take on you'll start to feel yourself again. You did well, its a better start than you could have hoped for. Keep it up.
I am sure you did well and yes it will be different because you are out of your comfort zone as craig said above!! Have a good day with George .....keep smiling
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